Mission verses Ministry

I've been thinking a lot about Mission verses Ministry this week. Last Sunday at church my pastor made a comment that I've been pondering all week. He said that the best place to recover from the exhaustion is to live in the mission. I wrote that down and then immediately wrote beside it - "how do you do that?".

I've served in ministry for 8 years now and with increasing frequency I find myself wanting to do anything else. It's a battle that I fight with myself. I love to see people's lives changed - to get to have an impact on them. At the same time, I feel worn out and like there's no season of rest that's adequate. So, when Ray made that statement it caused me to stop. At first I was skeptical - thinking, "he's an extreme people person....the ministry energizes him". Then I thought, "he doesn't do college ministry and travel 4 months out of the year so it's much easier for him to make that statement". Finally I decided that he was plain nuts and didn't know what he was talking about. (If you'd have seen Ray at Mardi Gras or even at breakfast this morning you might tend to agree with me).

However, the statement has come back to my mind again and again this week. I was talking to my friend Joe about Alan Hirch's book, "The Forgotten Ways" on Monday. Joe asked me what I liked about the book and I had forgotten (ironic considering the title). I grabbed my book and flipped it open. It landed on a page that talked about some of the problems of churches today. One was that they are ministry, not mission focused. As I saw these words, something clicked in my mind. I began to wonder....is the reason I'm so exhausted because I am living in ministry, not mission?

I remember going down to Mexico City in the spring - it was so freeing to do ministry there. Everyday I felt like we went out to see how the mission would be lived out that day. I've felt like that a few times as we've gotten started this fall (in-between phone appointments and paperwork). I think that my problem is I don't really live the mission (to bring the love of Christ to a hurting world - or the way we say it within Crusade to create movements everywhere so that everyone knows some one who truly follows Christ). That mission compels me - it excites me and it is indeed a place of rest. It doesn't leave me feeling under the pile or pressured - I feel free to open my eyes to what God is doing and be part of it. Somehow, I get that confused with ministry (a way to live out the mission). Ministry becomes the center - getting my "to-do" list accomplished...even if that means I can't get to campus or I don't have time to engage in the lives of other people. Making sure we have the best plans to reach our goal (I'm not against planning - it just seems like we talk a little about mission and a lot about how to do the ministry). My favorite one is creating meetings so we can solve the problems of the ministry. Some how the problems seem to grow and my desire to see the mission accomplished seems to fade.

So I've decided that Ray is probably not crazy after all (at least on this topic). That the mission is what energized me.....it's what I can live out in the midst of any circumstance of life. Now my challenge is how to live for the mission not the ministry. When I live for the ministry, I start to demand a "normal" life. I want my rights. I want the right to live in a safe place, to be cool when I want to be cool, to sleep when I want to sleep, to not have to give too sacrificially of my time or resources, and to get to move to the place I want to live and have all the comforts of life but at the same time call myself a radical disciple of Christ. When I live the mission, nothing is too great a sacrifice in light of the sacrifice that Christ has made for me.

So the challenge is to live in the mission - to find rest in the mission. It's not an easy place to be. I'm better at ministry because I can control that. But the mission brings me to life! Maybe that's one of the reason's Christ said, "I have come that they might have life and have it abundantly".

The Journey of Katrina

There's been a lot to ponder in the last few days here in New Orleans. This is a crazy city and it has completely changed everything about the way I view ministry and God. It's been an unexpected journey, but none the less a journey that has so shaped me I cannot imagine what my life would have been like if I had not walked its path. It's strange to think that for the rest of my life, Hurricane Katrina will not be something that happened in a city somewhere in my country. It will not be something I only remembered on occasion, but it will a part of who I am. As my friend pointed out, for those of us who have been a part of this city (and me less than those who actually lived through the actual hurricane), our lives will be forever marked by "before Katrina and after Katrina".

Today is the 2 year anniversary of Katrina - I went to a noon prayer at my church. I watched friends who lived here their whole lives weep at how difficult the last two years have been - people whose homes are rebuilt - who have education and means. I looked around and saw how tired everyone in the room seemed to be. There is a weariness that comes with living here. Yesterday as I left for campus, the thought crossed my mind - I'm just so tired of this constant battle. That's what an outsider who has moved here and who loves city feels so I can only imagine those who lived through the devastation. As I've watched people's stories on the news today I've wondered, "when will this end"?

I think that most of America is tired of hearing about New Orleans - about Katrina. We're just this sad city that's spinning out of control. Major magazines have questioned if New Orleans is worth saving. I can understand the question....when you are coming from a completely scientific point of view it seems ludicrous to save this city. But science can't measure the heart. It can't calculate the stories of people who have lived here for generations - the musicians, the Mardi Gras Indians, the Krews, the families, the stories. There is something about New Orleans that gets into the very fiber of your being - it becomes not just a place to live, but a part of who you are. I say this after living here only a year. I can only imagine how those who trace their roots all the way back hundreds of years must feel.

There is weariness - and hope is very frail these days. So many have been fighting battles for so long. It seems like it will never end and everyone still wants to point fingers at who is to blame rather than take responsibility and move forward. (Today I was seriously disappointed in both Nagin - for continuing to point fingers with no real plan and with Bush - for making a PR visit with no real plan.)It's been two years - will it ever really be okay again? This city needs the gospel. The truth that Christ redeems people and places. That He will indeed make all things new. The life and the hope that believers and the true church (rather than religion) can bring.

This journey has shaped me so much because for the first time in my Christian life I understand at a deep level my great need for the gospel. I need it when I don't safe walking home at night - I need it when I already feel exhausted first thing in the morning on my way to campus. I need it when I wait in long lines and when I see the despair in the lives around me. I also need the church - the body of believers who in tangible (but not perfect) ways demonstrate the love of Christ. In American Christianity we tend to have the "me and God" attitude. Be the strong one - be the one who is in control - just "me and God", that's all I need. Living life that way is no longer an option. Just as I need the gospel, I need the church. This needy city has shown me quiet a bit about my own need and that has become my unforgettable journey of Katrina.

The Wedding Thief

"Has anyone seen my purse?"

I felt like I asked that question a thousand times - each time I felt a little more panicked than the last time I had asked. In my purse were my wallet with all my credit cards, my Treo with all my contacts, and my camera. No one had seen it but everyone was sure it would turn up in the morning.

After a very full summer, I went to Northern Alabama this past weekend to celebrate the wedding of some good friends from New Orleans - Doug and Toy. It was amazing to celebrate their lives and love that night. Out of about 700 people there were probably about 70 of us from New Orleans, but you could tell that we brought the spirit of New Orleans with us - we were the first ones on the dance floor and the last ones to leave! Doug and Toy's wedding was such a beautiful picture of love and celebration but it ended with my purse being stolen. By 11:00 am the next day we had confirmed that almost $1000 had been purchased on my credit cards.

Honestly, it felt like a kick in the gut after such a long and challenging summer. We got home around 8:00pm Sunday night and I knew that I needed to be on campus first thing Monday morning to kick off the semester and tell students about having a relationship with God. How on earth was I going to do that? God met me in such a tangible way on Monday morning.

It was one of those mornings that I could barely open up the Word so I read a devotional book. Through a series of passages I ended up in Hosea 6:1-3

Come let us return to the Lord
He has torn us to pieces
Now He will heal us
He has injured us
Now He will bandage our wounds
In just a short time He will restore us,
So that we may live in His presence
Oh, that we might know the Lord!
Let us press on to know Him
He will respond to us as surely as the arrival of the dawn
or the coming of rains in early spring.


All of the verses that I had read up until this point also held the theme of brokenness and healing. I couldn't help but think of the brokenness that had touched my world over the weekend - the effects of sin that led some one to the place where they steal in the midst of a great celebration. Reading that passage made me realize how broken I have been in life - how much I need the healing hand of the Lord - and how much He longs to meet me.....that His healing is active, it is sure, it seeks me out!

As I drove to Delgado Community College, I noticed that a lot of work had been done on familiar streets. Three months earlier on the same drive I saw many abandoned homes with their overgrown lawns and leftover paint marks from the days after the hurricane...now those streets seemed neat and clean again. Delgado was teaming with students - there seemed to be more life than I'd ever experienced in the campus. At the same time, I think the events of the weekend and my time meditating on healing gave me a new perspective on what I was doing. Our mission isn't about launching movements - it's about getting to those students that are hurting - that are at the place where they feel "torn to pieces" with no hope for healing". Two students came by our table who really touched my heart. One guy's name was Steven and he stopped by when he saw we were a Christian organization. He was just back from Iraq where he had watched his whole unit die and then was shot in the back by a 9 year old kid. The pain was all over his face. Later, Jon stopped by. Jon was diagnosed with cancer earlier this summer. When that happened, he started to wonder about eternity. He wanted a safe place to explore...he's been getting sermons from Youtube.

Usually when I go on campus, I'm looking for leaders....but that day God opened my eyes to the broken.....and reminded me that we are broken - that we all need His healing. When Steven and Jon came by our table, I knew that God longed to heal them just as He has healed me in so many ways. It was a great way to start the semester!